AMANDA PETERSON

 

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Saturday, June 08, 2002

 

THE REAL DIRT ON MOZILLA

Here at your AP Site we don't often comment on the latest computer technology or the latest "killer ap", but we have come across some very interesting (thought provoking (sp?) information). About a month ago we started using the Mozilla Browser and right off the bat we loved it. Pages loaded quickly, there were very little bugs, and we could access our AIM pretty easily. Immedialty we thought; "Well, this is to good to be true." The Mozilla folks are probably funneling money to the I.R.A. (not the retirement account) or something. I mean, why make something that works so well free? Hmmm. So we investigated. Yes, we investigated Mozilla. What we found was quite the enigma. We were able to talk to some of those most important people in the Mozilla organization. Some of them spoke to us and were very helpful, some of them spoke to us "off the record", some of them just plain wouldn't talk to us at all. I'd be lying if I said at least one of them didn't threaten us (in a wierd Star Trek over the top Shatner kind of way). Well anyway, what follows is the what we were able to cull from countles (7) emails, and many AIM (2) conversations about Mozilla.
Mozilla Is A Web Browser
Mozilla is a tool that you use to view sites on the internet. If you click on the Mozilla icon you will (after a few seconds) have a 'browser' in which you can type (into the address bar) the location of a web site, and be able to view its content. If you use a Mac you only have to click on the icon once, but if you use an IBM compatable (sp?) computer you will have to click twice (2 times).
Mozilla Looks A Lot Like Netscape
The Mozilla browser looks a lot like the Netscape browser. As a matter of fact if you place your mouse over 'file' and click and than slide down to 'new' you are given the option to open a new 'Navigator Window'. Of course you can also tell its Netscape Navigator like by the fact that it looks like the Netscape navigator. What throws you off, of course, is unlike the Netscape Navigator this browser willl allow you to view websites on the internet (world wide web).
The Mozilla Browser Will Help You 'Score' With Girls
This information comes from an interview with Mozilla architect and and Technical Director Brendan Eich. According to Mr. Eich he once "scored" with a girl while talking about the Mozilla browser at his brother's wedding. Whats truely amazing about this story is that Brendan Eich's brother was married in July of 1995, almost four years before Mozilla was created (or even thought of). Which of course, attests to the 'awesomeness' of the Mozilla browser. That before anyone had even thought of it, someone had used it to "score".
The Mozilla Browser Will Help You 'Score' With Guys
This information comes from an interview with Mozilla architect and and Technical Director Brendan Eich. According to Mr. Eich he once "scored" with a guy while talking about the Mozilla browser at his brother's wedding. Whats truely amazing about this story is that Brendan Eich's brother was married in July of 1995, almost four years before Mozilla was created (or even thought of). Which of course, attests to the 'awesomeness' of the Mozilla browser. That before anyone had even thought of it, someone had used it to "score".
Mozilla Loads Faster Than Internet Explorer
I use a dial up modem, and at least once a day I load up my page to see if anyone has left any YACCS comments. With I.E. it takes about three minutes, with Mozilla it takes about fifteen seconds.
Mozilla Disciplines My Kids
According to Mozilla user Angelique Hastings, Mozilla has kept her kids from "mouthing off" or "back sassing". Anglique fashioned (out of an old ping pong paddle) a discipline tool she calls ' The Mozilla'. What she did was find a wooden ping pong paddle and drilled seven holes in it (so it would cut down on wind resitance) which she uses to "whack" her two kids (two year old Justin and three year old Ashley) on the behind whenever they get; "Out of line." According to Angelique, she gives them the "Mozilla" all over their rear end.
Mountain Dew Code Red
This has nothing to do with Mozilla but at least two Mozilla users we talked to sang the praises of Mountain Dew Code Red. Presumbably so they could stay up late at night.
Mozilla Will Make You Gay! According to I.E. User Haden Chance
Long time I.E. (Internet Explorer) user Haden Chance posted on his own personal website that the use of Mozilla would make you gay. When questioned about this Haden did not respond. When questioned further he did not respond. When questioned again Haden's website (when visited) displayed a '404 Error'.
Mozilla Will Give You A Million Dollars!
According to to Mozilla Community Quality Advocate Asa Dotzler the Mozilla Browser will give a million dollars to its 'one millionth' user. When questioned about the 'one millionth user' Asa explained it as the the one millionth person to use Mozilla will recieve a million dollars. When asked how they would assess the 'one millionth' user, Asa pointed out that they use Site Meter and would have no problem figuring out who the "one millionth user" was. At least according to their I.P. address.
6/08/2002 03:44:00 AM
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